Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Advent 2013, Day Three

"If we start without confidence, we have already lost half the battle and we bury our talents. While painfully aware of our own frailties, we have to march on without giving in, keeping in mind what the Lord said to Saint Paul: 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness' (2 Cor. 12:9)." (Pope Francis, Evangelii Gaudium, 81)
I come to this current attempt at daily blogging not from a place of strength but with a tentative heart still broken in several places, fearful of exposing it to further misunderstanding and misuse. For the third day in a row, but more so today, it has been difficult to compose something that feels safe yet meaningful. All day I have been wondering why I have thought continuing this blog is necessary or desireable.

Partly from personal interest and partly in preparation for a work project, I have been reading Pope Francis's recent Apostolic Exhortation, Evangelii Gaudium, "The Joy of the Gospel," and it is the paragraph quoted above that gave me courage to consider posting here today.

Then I looked back at the Lectionary for today's Mass, and found encouragement there as well, in the Communion Antiphon: "What I say to you in the darkness, speak in the light, says the Lord. What you hear whispered, proclaim on the housetops" (Matthew 10:27).

Yet even with these two trustworthy nudges, I was tempted to forgo posting here today. Then I happened to open up a blog post about a statue of Jesus' mother that the blog's author has fondly nicknamed Our Lady of Brokenness. She writes:
Most of us try and cover up our brokenness in life, even after healing, but I know in my own situation some of the scars are still visible and if I start to scratch at them then they begin to bleed again.

So I am happy to have this statue of Our Lady close to me in the morning and at night as a reminder of my fragility and weakness which I become more aware of as I age.

I sometimes see it in others as well, not because I look for it, but because I recognise traits of myself. However, I am consoled by the truth that if I also witness love in others it can only be because love dwells in me also.
So, I entrust all of the words in this blog (not just today's post) to you who, for whatever reason, are reading this, believing that if you perceive the love intended here, it is because you too have love in your heart, and praying that this mutual love, if it exists, will one day lead to wholeness, in our broken selves and in our broken relationships.


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